The Day The Music Stopped

A year ago today the world lost someone truly amazing. An energy and spirit I am certain will never bless this earth again. A woman with a strength unlike anything I have ever seen…unlike anything I will see again. One year ago on this very day, the DJ I relied on to provide the music that was the soundtrack for my life, had no more music to give. 

I was sitting in the lobby of my hotel near the Mayo Clinic listening to one of my favorite songs, Sarah McLachlan’s “In The Arms of An Angel” when I got the email that DJ was gone. For days my logical brain told me to accept that her time on this earth was ending, but my heart kept willing you to live a little longer. Literally, minute after minute I refreshed my email over a hundred times throughout the day, waiting to see if God would step in like Jordan 4th Quarter in 1992. I petitioned for her harder for than anyone I’ve petitioned for the entire time I’ve been on this earth. 

Selfishly, I wanted DJ the Warrior Princess longer. I had only experienced a taste of her amazing presence, but desired to have more. I only experienced passing momments of her sternly gentle wisdom and felt cheated. How crazy is that? I willed her to stay so that her contribution to my life would remain in unchanged. In retrospect, I understand the true selfishness of my prayers. Who was I to pray against the highest reward one can gain?

So, on this day rather than reflect on the hole left by your departure, I focus on the blessing that was your presence. I see now that your contributions to this world remain, even though your physical body is no more. Know that you are missed, but also know that this little life you touched so briefly was forever changed. The fight song your life gave me is permanently engraved in my heart, and I will use it to dance every single day I have above ground. Rest with the angels DJ.

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